 |
| |
|
 School holiday problems |
|
 |
|
 |
|
Peter was determined to make the school holidays an adventure his children would never forget - a trip to Queensland and money to splurge on movies, computer games, eating out and lots of other fun things. It was the first chance the 36-year-old office worker had to spend time with his two children - Thomas, 10, and Emma, 8, - since splitting with his wife towards the end of last year.
Peter felt his children had suffered from the family breakdown and he saw the summer holidays as his big chance to make it up to them. Over the next three weeks, Peter devoted his attention to Thomas and Emma. With his holiday pay in his pocket, he took them wherever they wanted and let them stay up late. He felt like their father again.
Peter knew the holiday had to end and had been trying to psyche himself up to parting with the children for another two weeks when the court order allowed him to see them again. When it came to the crunch Peter found it too tough to give the children back to their mother, convincing himself they were better off with him than at their regular home. So, he kept them.
Parents refusing to return their children to their former partner after holidays is one of the most heart-wrenching and complex problems faced by broken families over school holidays. Before Christmas, parents squabble over who gets the kids on the special day but the end of the holidays often give rise to more tragic family disputes.
Carried away by the emotion of having their children to themselves, some parents decide to defy court orders, sparking post-holiday disputes. This is often caused when a parent who does not normally have residence of the children gets carried away by the "Disneyland Syndrome" - a term used by the legal profession to describe the unreal family situation created by parents - such as Peter - away from the doldrums of routines and activities.
By taking the children to interesting places every day, giving them undivided attention and abandoning boring habits such as early bed times all helps to create this fantastic adventure. The syndrome tends to be more common with parents who are often financially better off than their former partner and can afford to spend more money on leisure activities.
Garry Watts, one of the foremost experts in family law in Australia, said post-holiday residence battles was a common problem at holiday time. Mr Watts heads a team of 5 accredited specialists in family law and 7 lawyers specialising in family law at Watts McCray Solicitors at Parramatta and Sydney.
Based on over 25 years experience in family law, Mr Watts said the problems are not limited to parents refusing to return children after the holidays.
It also includes parents who are suddenly dissatisfied with the contact arrangements or decide they want residence of the children.
"In the lead-up to Christmas we tend to spend a considerable amount of time in court trying to sort out contact orders and reach agreements on who has the children," Mr Watts said.
"It is an emotional time for everyone and people can get into enormous fights over contact. However, in my experience the nature of family disputes generally changes as the holiday period wears on. At the end of the holidays we are generally dealing with incidences where a parent is reluctant to return the child or children once their contact period has ended.
"There is also the parent who has had the children over the holidays and suddenly wants residence of them or the people who become dissatisfied with the contact regime and want to see the children more. They often fall into the "Disneyland Syndrome" which is a term used to describe the phenomena where a parent can provide attention in a concentrated, relaxed and non-routine way. It is easy to forget while in holiday mode with a few extra dollars to spend, the reality of being a full time parent when the school shoes don't fit, uniforms need ironing, books have to be bought and all the kids need bus passes.
"Add to that the problems associated with before and after school care. A lot of people get wound up and carried away with the emotion and do not always see things rationally or consider the best interest of their children," Mr Watts said.
"In some cases it is necessary to tip buckets of reality on them in the best interests of themselves and their children." If you need assistance in defining proper contact or getting children back after contact it is best to contact a specialist family lawyer.
Watts McCray & Co
February 2001
February, 2001
|
|
 |
|
